Sunday, September 09, 2007

Lordy, I'm almost _ _ _ _ _

I'm about to turn 40.
The number itself doesn't bother me; I'm ok with my age.
I think what's got me down a bit is trying to chart my progress as a human that's been around for 40 years.
I'm not sure I'm evolving.

Positive growth:

I rarely suffer from severe depression anymore.
I don't lose things much anymore.
I'm less dramatic.

No growth:

Self-absorbed.
Neglectful.
Overly-sensitive.
Insecure.
Habitual.
Low-risk.
Still not creating art despite ideas and opportunity.

That just doesn't look good on the whole.
Is this the stuff of middle-age crisises?

I just want to know I'm making this all count for something.

2 comments:

Appalachian Feminist Breeder said...

For what it is worth, I think you are swell.

firstimpressionist said...

Why thank you.
I hope I don't screw that up.